A number of gentlemen I’ve met shouldn’t have been dating at all because they are still grieving.And the most surprising phenomenon that I’ve witnessed in this pool of men is that being a pretty, happy, vivacious “cool chick” is a big negative strike against me.We don’t keep track of how many times our partner kept his/her mouth shut for the sake of harmony. If you think it’s because men like drama, I’ll have to respectfully disagree. Once a man reaches a certain age, he prefers easy relationships.
I’m not suggesting that the drama queens make sense to your ex’s, per se. I was on a plane two days ago and found myself seated next to an attractive and wealthy 59-year-old man. Keep in mind if you’re reading this that a younger woman doesn’t have to be a sycophant or a brainless chimp (although some insecure men are just fine with that).He gets his butt kicked time and again and then cries on my shoulder.I’ve tried all the big dating websites and I go out a lot (that is another weird phenomenon – men my age sit home on the weekends and don’t go out and do anything so I never meet anyone by just going out and having fun).These are not the adjectives women use to describe themselves; these are the adjectives that men often use to describe you based on their own dating experiences.A relevant aside: Last year, it dawned on me that for every “crazy girl” dating story I had, there was a woman on the other end who was telling her own version of the story, except that in her version, she’s the heroine and I’m the bad guy. It’s much easier to find fault in others than it is to find it in ourselves.